Fashion Police

Yesterday while waiting for the Metro to arrive, I was struck by a relatively attractive guy on the platform--rare for Silver Spring. I was then equally struck by his god-awful shoes. They were neither Tevas nor Crocs, but the bastardized child spawned from the breeding of those two fashion faux-pas: Croq-sandals. Unbelievable...Crocs with straps around parts of the foot. Granted, I wear some ugly shoes to work cause they're good for walking, and I routinely do 1.5 miles of walking in my daily commute...but come on! Do you really need to wear Croc sandals to work?!!

And now the sickest manifestation of Crocs...female dress shoes. As if slip-ons weren't bad enough before, they've just become quite possibly the least sexy item a woman can wear on her feet.

The Kid

As alluded to in a previous blog, I should have another outta-towner visit this weekend. And, like any visitor, there's a helluva story that goes along with this one. I started chatting with this guy Mike online--I don't remember how/where we met. He was living in Pitt, I was in Atlanta. He was younger (like 18/19) but cute and sweet...and being 24, that was an acceptable age range still. We never really intended on meeting, just one of those long distance chat pals (or the equivalent of the modern-day pen pal). We stopped chatting when he started dating a 40-something man, who was obviously only into the relationship to keep Mike as his prize. I couldn't convince him of it, even though the daddy constantly cheated on him. Stuff like that frustrates me so greatly that I just need to cease communication with weak-minded (and willed) people.

After a two year hiatus, we reconnected a few months ago. And with it came a confession: he's now 21, which made him considerably younger at the time. Basically, he lied to me--he wasn't sure, but he said there was the possibility that he wasn't even 18 at the time. I got very disgusted over this, as I have never considered even chatting with a youngin--even if it was legal in good ole Georgia, where I lived. Oh well...water under the bridge now.

So now that I'm in DC, he's lookin forward to meeting. I'm slightly apprehensive, as nothing good usually comes from meeting someone you've "known" for so long. Its usually quite disappointing. (WOW...I have a classic story to share when I have the time) But what the hell...cant hurt. If he's absolutely annoying in person, I'm man enough to say that now, and Pitt isn't too far a drive back home anyway.

Pee-Pee Observations

Behaviors that confer an elevated fitness on the individual are often passed down through the generations--this is an essential element of natural selection and evolution. For example, intricate mating calls may be linked with other phenotypic traits that improve reproductive success, and often they reduce the need to expend energy visually searching for mates or finding the wrong sex or species after searching--less time searching means more time for mating, and thus more offspring. Its easy to see how behaviors may be inherited. Some behaviors, however, seem to have little to no evolutionary benefit--as is the case with many human traits, since the environment rarely dictates our fitness. As I am an astute observer of behaviors (it was part of my original dissertation), I'm often puzzled by some of these displays when it comes to peeing. Apparently there are many convergent or inherited behaviors that are common place in bathrooms from sea to shining sea...I'll outline the ones I just don't get:

• The need to spit into the urinal while unzipping the fly
• Peeing with no hands
• Rocking back n forth or side to side
• Propping oneself up on the wall or urinal divider with one arm
• Groaning

Contemptuous Careers

Most of us in DC work at relatively large agencies, companies, or corporations. Part of this work environment is dealing with people who have completely different jobs than your own, and thus personalities. In prior jobs, I had to work alongside with engineers quite often--who are their own breed of human; some may argue that they're not real people at all. Currently the people that irk me greater than any other group are those that deal with policy and political relations. Specifically inter-agency and international affairs. I often look at them and think, "God, I'd kill myself if this was my job!" It seems like all they do is worry about this or that so that no one is ever offended, regardless of how useless that entity may be in the scheme of things. Do they really take joy in sweating the little things?



Every time I deal with policy people, I just want to strangle them. I guess this is definitely one area where my Aries hinders my job--I cant bite my tongue, beat around the bush, or sugar-coat things. But maybe this is why I am single, as asked by GCC. Do I treat too many people in my social life with the same amount of disdain as I do policy makers/political kiss-asses? If so, I need to identify this flaw and potentially correct my ways.

Quick Thoughts

I need to be more careful about what I look at on my computer. My boss, the director or satellite research, keeps popping in to chat or ask questions on a plan we're working on. Two days ago an email "Washington DC Young Gay Professionals" was on my huge 24" monitor. Today, I juuust minimized my blog screen with the porn image from the BDB blog before he came in. And yes...my back is turned to the door, but I hate sun on my screen.

BDB Update

Sorry to disappoint, especially the Arian-Mexican Offspring, but BDB couldnt make it to town due to car troubles. DAMNIT! I have another visitor this weekend (story to come) so it might be a while before I get to see BDB again.

Big Dicked Bottom

The Big Dicked Bottom, or BDB, is a guy I met online last year. Unfortunately he lives in Eastern Shore, so my exploits with him are somewhat limited. But our story is quite amazing. The BDB somehow chose me above all others on Myspace to hang out with....his first gay friend in DC. At 25, and a big Italian stallion muscle stud, he had never been with a guy before. WHAT?! Yea, I'm not shitting ya. So after "chilling" for a bit--mind you he brings out the butchest side in me, but its ok--we start messing around. I can tell he's not lying about me being his first guy as 1. he's obviously nervous and 2. isn't that 'good'. But these are the things you need to put up with when dealing with virgins.

Let's just say his virginity didn't last too long. He must've been fantasizing about this moment for a long time, as he was very willing. I doubt I've ever encountered anything hotter than a big muscle bottom begging for more. His ass is named "Henry" because its so large it requires naming. Wow. And not flabby, all muscle with some padding. Obviously, with a name like BDB, he ain't hurtin up front either.

So the good news...he's making a return trip to DC this weekend. I guess this will be our 4th meeting. It really is a shame he doesn't live here, nor is he planning to move. Oh well. One more potential that has no potential.

The Single Life

After freely admitting that he'd toss me like a cum rag, GCC wonders 'why I think I'm single'. *Deep breath*

I think I've thrown around this "problem" before, as I'm constantly asked about it. To begin, I've had 3 real relationships in my life. I classify them as that since at some point I cried over the person I was with. As you all know, there's the now infamous Nicole, who most of the team has met, but also JR and Erik. Others I'd just classify as dates. I think in all of those cases, each person will testify to the fact that I'm a giving person. I gladly go the extra mile for big things, but never forget the little things. And even when a relationship ends, its rarely on a bad note. I'm still friends with all my ex's.

So why have I been single now for 5 years? (Odd isn't it? That's also the same length of time its been since I bottomed) I definitely have some theories to explain this question, lemme break em down:

1. Nomadic lifestyle. In the last 5 years, I've moved from ATL to FL to ATL to FL and finally to DC. Finding a relationship usually takes time, and no one moves without a little heads-up. Usually it takes me a good 6 months to meet a good group of friends and settle into a new city. From there it takes some time to meet the right guy via networking. As addicted as we all are to online man-searching, I've found that's rarely how the good ones are discovered. I don't date new-arrivals, and wouldn't expect anyone else to date me soon after moving--damaged goods.


2. Physical stature. Let's face it, most gay guys don't like smaller guys. The ones that do usually have issues (chicken hawks, the need to dominate, or they're even smaller than 5'6). I don't have a preference, necessarily, for any particular size. Though I do get hot 'n bothered by big "mountains of man". However, they almost NEVER want someone who's my size. Let's also not forget that most people assume short = full of attitude (arguable in my case). But I like all shapes and sizes.


3. The Aries personality. Some people really dislike my outspokenness, sarcasm, and biting sense of humor. I admit it, sometimes I should hold-back on certain comments, as many people can only throw punches and can't take em. As much as I throw, I take a regular beating too. Hell, my whole childhood was a verbal assault from peers. Above all else, personality it the clincher for me. The guy MUST be able to have dynamic, free-flowing conversations. I enjoy silence, but that should be a minority of the time. Some conversations are completely meaningless--back n forth comedy, but at least they keep you entertained. Not everything must be, for an example, a discourse on the intricacies of gene regulation or stable-state dynamics in ecosystems.


4. Miscellaneous. I reject the notion that a top wouldn't be interested in dating me. I'd gladly switch to a 50/50 or even 40/60 relationship. However, this categorization plays a large roll in how people deem the compatibility of a potential "mate."

For some reason I focused all of these points on the negative...as if something is wrong with me for the reason of being single. Maybe nothing is wrong and I'm just 1. too picky and 2. not putting myself out in situations where I'm more likely to meet guys. Who knows. I'd love your assessment!!

A Dry Life

My esteemed swimming-wife, the Arian-Mexican Offspring, posed the question during my open solicitation for blog ideas, "If you couldn't swim anymore, what would you do?" This one is pretty simple, so here it goes...

I started swimming competitively at the age of 8 during summer league. At 13, I started year-round training--summer league and fall/winter/spring aquatics club. After high school I always trained by myself during rec swim at UNCW and Ga Tech. So in essence I've never been without swimming in 21 years (wow...that's almost as long as you've been alive A-MO). I've had the occasional breaks--like when I lived in FL for a year and, surprisingly, didn't have any real access to a competitive pool. Even then, I tried to swim in the ocean as much asi could. And also to compensate, I trained at the gym a lot harder. I was up to 150lbs (I'm 140 now), and actually forced myself to do cardio--mostly elliptical and treadmills.

When I moved to DC, I saw swimming more as a way to meet people then to get into competitive shape again, especially since I moved here not knowing a soul. Like many on DCAC, for me the team is equal parts exercise and social-networking. If I lost the ability to swim--like when I sprained my ankle after moving here and swimming for two months with the team--I'd compensate in my usual Aries way. (Typically I pretend that 'lost' things in my life are dead, and thus must cope and not dwell on them) I'm sure I'd get back to a beefy 150lbs of muscle rather quickly. Being short (5'6"), muscular physiques are often what people turn to to get attention, I'd be no different if I wasn't burring 10,000 calories a week swimming. However, the loss of swim training would leave some uncertainties in my life, such as:

• Would the friends I've made on the team still include me in social activities if I wasn't on the team anymore? A lot of what we do centers around post-practice meals, social activities that are spur of the moment ideas after meets/practice, etc. We rarely have non-teammates (except swim wives) engaged in our circle of friends and activities. I'd hope this wouldn't be the case.


• Would I be as regimented in including cardio into my exercise routine? Often I've skipped that component since I detest running and quickly get bored doing cardio at the gym. As 30 approaches (and subsequent years), I need to maintain some level of cardio activity to promote heart health, and keep those abs showing. Who wants a short, fat gay man? I'd definitely increase the amount of biking I do, besides for commuting purposes.


• Would I find an equally interesting social group based on other activities? I contemplated joining the DC gay scuba club--but that's not really a cohesive group. The do like 1 trip a year, rarely anything often. Nothing like the interaction we have on the team--training 6x per week.
  

Ask the ConsummateAries

Again I'm at a loss of things to write about...something about my brain being drained these last couple days. So I'm soliticing to topics/questions....

Wasting a Day

I think its official...my work-related bulimic binging over the last three days has left me drained. I have no steam left in this tugboat. As of 11am, I've accomplished the following:

1. Sent several useless emails
2. Gave up on a satellite rainfall animation due to my ADD
3. Pretended to work on a grant proposal at the Caribou across the street
4. Pretended to go to a meeting, when in actuality I walked to the DSW three blocks away and went shoe shopping
5. Came back and wrote this pathetic excuse for a blog

Its 4pm and time to go home!

The True Measure of Success

After the two-day swim meet this weekend, I just vegged out at home for a few hours yesterday before seeing Superbad. Of course, a major component of my couch potato activities is searching for, downloading, and watching porn. Now I enjoy, and have a collection, of all types of porn "genres." However, if there's one thing I cant stand (in any porn genre), its porn with plot and scene acting. But in one I was watching yesterday--filmed in my former hometown of Ft Lauderdale--there was a intro scene with a hurricane forecaster. And lo-and-behold...there was one of my images from work. An image of Hurricane Katrina slapped in the middle of a raunchy bb gay porno. YES!!! I've finally made it. Yet again, more ways in which porn intersects with my life.

The image used in the porn.

Three Words

Go see it! This movie was really enjoyable. It wasn't stupid humor like American Pie, and the copious copycats that followed. And no, they didn't show all the funny parts in the trailers. There was so much good stuff they couldn't actually show on tv. As I'm tired and its late, and I don't want to spoil anything, I'll leave it at that.

Hurricanes!

Its no secret to my friends what I do for a living. But I thought I'd share with the rest of you some of the stuff I've done today.

• Kickass animation of Hurricane Dean and Tropical Depression Erin

You'll want to have QuickTime to see the animation above. Enjoy!

Cobbwebs

In my first blog, I mentioned that one reason I'm trying to regularly write things about my life is because my memory isn't nearly as sharp as it used to be, which troubles me greatly. Case in point: last weekend there was talk about some cute, slightly hairy new guy at practice who mentioned my name. They said his name was Jared, which didn't ring any bells in my head. No big deal, I figured there was a mix up. Then last night I see this hot guy stretching on the pool deck while I'm doing warm-up. Naturally, I stop to gawk. As soon as he sees me he smiles and says my name--I'm caught off-guard. Has my reputation preceded itself that bad/well? I could only hope. But no, somehow he knew me and my name, though I couldn't ever remember seeing him in person. Of course this leads me to assume we've chatted online. So in my head I start running through the various face pics of guys I chat with lately. FACE RECOGNITION: NEGATIVE. Luckily I briefed SD on the situation and the did the very outspoken, "Hi my name is __, what is yours?" Phew, at least now I knew his name.

After practice ends I rush home, look through the folder I keep of guys face pics, each saved by their online alias--I can never remember who people are otherwise. Nope, he's not in there either. FUCK! I wait 30min and then get an IM request. DING DING DING. Chatting back and forth for a few minutes, then comes the flashback. He has a boyfriend. STATUS: NOT A REAL PERSON.

Just my luck. Someone is excited to see me, but is already hitched. GRRR! JB, where's my drink?!

Reasons Why I'm Gay

...Cause women will spend 5 minutes searching around in their purse for exact change while there's a line at the register.

I'm a Tiger!

Odd moment in the elevator today...Leave a meeting in one building to go back to my office in another, hop in the elevator. Two floors down someone else gets in, he almost startles me cause he looks very much like Remis Lupin, the werewolf in Harry Potter.

He then says to me, in crazy mutter-speak, "Wow, you look just like Tiger Woods, except your shirt is green not red." WOW...is he blind? First of all, my shirt was grey. So basically I was wearing black dress pants today, but lemme break it down to contast me vs Tiger.

Me: 5'6" tall, white male, gray shirt, blank pants, loves cock
Tiger: 6'2" tall, black male, various Nike shirts, black pants, only dates white chicks


Yup...only have the black pants thing in common.

Quick Thoughts

Isn't it odd that Bush's approval rating has gone up lately while he's been on vacation in Maine and Texas? Seems like people think he does his best work when he's not actually working--or fucking things up even more.

Poll results

Poster Boy for the Insane

Andrew Dysart's picture has been plastered all over local news outlets for his decision to wear a empty holster to his GMU classes--a sign of his desire to carry his permitted handgun on campus, which is currently (and rightfully) banned.

How crazy are these people? Do they exist in a world of such fear that they need their security blankets with them at all times? Maybe Andrew's mom took away his teddy bear at too early an age, thus he feels insecure and paranoid.

What's even crazier? The Express Poll shows that, at least from my Metro station (albeit somewhat ghetto), 60% of the public are in favor of allowing permitted weapons on campus. Right...cause there's so many mass killing sprees. I guarantee this: if they were permitted, a hell of a lot more than 32 people would be killed on campuses every year. Not only that, teachers would feel threatened by students arguing the merits of their answers to tests, pleading for a grade bump-up, etc. Martial law on campus? Yea, that's just what we need to train the next generation in how to be law abiding, peaceful citizens in corporate America.

The New Bike

After an arduous search across at four DC neighborhoods and six bike shops, I finally settled on one I liked. Since there is sometimes a dearth of bike reviews, I'll give mine for the models I tested. Ultimately, I was looking for something around $500 (so I can afford to have it stolen again), hybrid (but a rugged one), smooth gear components, and a more aggressive geometry--I didn't want to sit completely erect. I ended up buying a Gary Fisher Wingra.

Bike Reviews
Gary Fisher Wingra
Price: $465 (Capitol Hill Bikes)
Description: My previous bike was a Gary Fisher, too, and I was happy with the ratio of price:component quality. I also very much liked the Genesis frame line, which my Marlin was part of. No wonder I liked geometry of this bike--it was also a Genesis frame, meaning I had the same body position on this hybrid as I did on my mountain bike. Excellent. That was the most important selling point. The more forward position really allows ya to churn through those steep hill climbs--something very common in DC, especially in Adams Morgan, where I live. If you've ever gone up 15th St NW between U and Columbia, you know what I mean. The frame is also pretty light, an aluminum alloy. Surprisingly for aluminum, it doesn't ride that rough. The gears shifted very nicely, maybe even better than my older Marlin, though those components were considered an upgrade (Shimano Alivo vs Deore). We'll see in a few months how they last. The tires were also what I was looking for--not smooth, thin road tires, but instead puncture resistant with some actual tread to help out in wet weather. Good overall blend of quality, price, and ride. This is the bike I bought. I also slapped on some toe clips, bar ends with padded grip tape, a Pit-Bull U-Lock with additional rear tire chain, and head/tail lights.

Others Tested (in no particular order)
Jamis CodaSport
Price: $480 (City Bikes)
Description: This bike was silky smooth in its gearing, but I felt like I was straight out of The Muppet Movie, where Kermie and Piggie are biking down the road in their cruisers. It felt like I was sitting completely upright, which I did not like. Also, as a gay man, the paint job was something to be desired.

Giant FCR3
Price: $495 (The Bike Rack)
Description: Not bad, overall middle of the line. This one did not shift as well as the Jamis, and the geometry was somewhere in between the Fisher and Jamis, but still a little too erect. Tires were a little too much on the "road" side of the continuum. The weight was great on this, very easy to carry up the Metro escalators (or so I could tell).

Trek 7.3
Price: $480 (Revolution Cycles)
Description: Since Gary Fisher and Trek are owned by the same parent company, these two bikes were pretty similar. Good body position and components, for the money. The Fisher edged this one out because of the tires, I also did prefer the rugged powder black paint on the Fisher over the glossy blue of the Trek.

Marin Lucas Valley
Price: $799 (Big Wheel Bikes)
Description: Nice bike, just too much money. The frame was an aluminum and carbon fiber composite, making it very light, but able to dampen shock. Shifting was smooth and the geometry was great. Shame it wasn't $200 less. But that's the trade-off between money and performance.

Can a ConsummateAries be Courteous, Too?

I constantly find myself in conflicting situations. Raised with the proper manners of any outstanding suburbanite, I always say "thanks," hold doors open, and let people ahead of me, especially women. Herein lies the conflict with my Aries...I'm very competitive and Type-A; this manifests itself as me being a fast walker and always in a rush. So after I let everyone go in front of me to exit the elevator, I try to zoom right past them to get out of the building door. Quite often I get stuck behind slow walkers--the most annoying things in my life. The only time I'm not ultra-courteous is when I'm on the Metro. Its every man/woman for himself. I don't give up my seat, unless its for someone old or disabled, and I'll fight to get in the car so I can have my choice of seats.

My Favorite Injun, Part II

As I first described here, there is a very colorful bum who sits outside my office building, at the Silver Spring Metro overpass. His antics are legendary, at least in my small universe. Today was the coup de gras...a personal interaction with the "Silver Injun." At around 9:40 I gave into my coffee craving, not having any 1/2 and 1/2 in the fridge at work, I decided to walk across the street to Caribou and purchase a chalice of my favorite nectar of the gods. As I walk out of the glass doors in my building, there's the Silver Injun down the walkway...not in his usual Metro location. He sees me 30 feet away and starts a ritual. I wasn't sure if it was tai-chi or an incantation--I guess we'll find out if I die in the next 36 hours. Of course I walk by him as if he's not there. Bums are dead to me, they're not real people. And unlike Haley Joel Osment, I don't see dead people.

As I return with my Organic Light Blend, creamed and sweetened, there he is again...and we have yet another mono e mono. As if the incantation didn't suddenly make my wallet burst forth and spill into his Big Gulp cup, he decides the mumble-yelling "HO! WA! HE!" might do the trick. I walked into the safety of my federal contractor-protected building, wondering, "Did I just hear a dead person?"

Become Wrath, Become Vengeance!

I've discussed my bike on several occasions (such as here and here). I depend on it as a mode of transportation since I am a car'less urbanite here in DC. In one of my previous blogs I wondered how I would react if my bike was stolen--since it almost happened 3 weeks ago. Sunday afternoon I went to my gym and locked my bike up outside of the WSC on Connecticut Ave. This is an exceptionally well populated area because of the Hilton next door. And the bike racks are blocked from the street by a line of cars, so I usually felt pretty secure there. You can see where I'm going with this. I decided to work my ass off at the gym, staying twice as long as usual. I emerged from the dungeon-like atmosphere at WSC to find three bike racks completely empty--including the one me bike was attached to. No signs, no cut locks, just empty racks. Some S.O.B. had a banner day.

I told GCC the other week when we were discussing this issue that I would probably cry if my bike was stolen. Surprisingly, I didn't. I think our conversation, which could be summed up as "having your bike stolen is inevitable, its bound to happen sooner or later", prepared me for this moment. It took 5 seconds to register what happened, then I started walking home--as it started to rain. Luckily I caught some cops at the Starbucks and filed a report--very fortuitous, since it meant not having to wait hours to do it after calling the PD. I doubt I would've filed a report otherwise. So the only remaining question is whether I file an insurance claim against it.

I'm now left wondering how I will react if/when I see my bike being ridden by some illegal Mexican in Adams Morgan. It was very distinctive--a model not sold in DC, smaller frame than average, along with some modifications. I picture a couple scenarios, and having the official police report increases my options

1. See the person riding it, knock them off it, and make off with my bike


2. Try to follow the person while calling the PD


3. See it locked up at a somewhere and A. disable it by removing/slashing the tires, then call the PD or B. Placing my own lock on the bike

Notice that none of these choices include being passive, peaceful, or non-revengeful. That's not an Aries trait, thus its not who I am. One of my friends left a comment on my Friendster profile, which is true...

--Despite my utter shock at learning I get on his nerves sometimes, I think [he] is an amazingly strong person with a personality that keeps you doubled over, begging for more. ...[He] exudes a simplicity of being that only comes from someone who is comfortable in their own skin. Be careful, though. Cross him, and you're likely to wind up maimed, lying in a ditch twitching uncontrollably somewhere on a two-lane road in South Georgia.

Take note, you god-damned useless life forms that roam the streets of Adams Morgan, I will exact my revenge, and it will be on my own time, when you least expect it!! Hopefully your family might recognize some party of your remains when they're shipped back to Mexico!

I'm still the world's best son!

My mom made her second official visit to DC this weekend, overall it went pretty well. Luckily, my A/C outage was fixed just shortly after she arrived on Friday, which made the logistics of entertaining mom much easier. To summarize the weekend's events, I'll bullet:

• I've never driven so much in DC, it was a nice change. I'm still a parallel parking Ace.
• My aerobed sleeps very well
• She thoroughly enjoyed going to swim practice, it brought back many memories from my youth and she always loves meeting the gays.
• We shopped and shopped, taking full advantage of her SUV: two trips to Target, Linens n Things, Best Buy, Home Rule, etc. Mostly housewares; no clothes shopping
• Watched three movies over 2 days: The Bourne Ultimatum (great movie), Hot Fuzz (very funny, but would be funnier with friends as opposed to mom), Underworld (we love monster movies)
• Ate at Logan Tavern @ The Heights (second time, still good), 17th St Cafe (brunch was yummy as always), Mama Lucia's, Parkway Deli (mmmm...latkas), and cooked at home once
• Visited The Spy Museum (save your $16 if you watch lots of The Hisotry Channel, like me)
• Never went to the Vietnam, FDR, or Lincoln like she originally wanted to--too friggin hot.
• Only had to do a drive-by thru Georgetown, which pleased me.
• She constantly interrogated me about men I date--I quickly changed the subject each time.
• I made up for forgetting her birthday last weekend.

Next time I promised her we'd go to a musical/play and do some more sights, just not in 98 degree weather.

What Never Was Is Ubiquitous

I never realized how many silver Honda Civics there are in this world until I bought one back in 2000. Was it that I was just unobservant or that there was a sudden spike in their popularity with the new model. Who knows. This disparity between what is and what we realize can be somewhat unnerving, when we consider examples for are serious than silver Civics.

What was: I never used to notice people walking around with respiratory masks.

What is: Last month the news was a'flutter with the Andrew Speaker case--the lawyer from Atlanta diagnosed with an acute drug resistant form of tuberculosis. Six months prior there was another popular media case of a man incarcerated by the local sheriff in a county jail because he refused to wear a respiratory mask to protect the public from his resistant form of TB. Now I see about 1 person every other day on the Metro with these masks. Where were they before...not wearing the masks, or just not on the Metro? It does make you wonder, if it is the former case, what bugs we could have potentially been exposed to. Though an alternative hypothesis could be that these people are now just overly paranoid as a result of the two high profile TB cases in the media.

Just as the Andrew Speaker case brought attention to our the laughable Homeland Security systems and the inability of the CDC to prevent the potential spread of infectious diseases, I now have a feeling a similar hypersensitivity will occur as a result of the Minneapolis bridge failures. Will we become more paranoid about where we drive? Lord knows people will avoid the beaches once a few shark attack stories hit the news (see the over-hyped "Summer of the Shark" if you don't believe me).

Packing it in

One might assume by the title of this blog that it would be another discourse on being a top, or something of the sort. Nope. Right now I'm literally listening to the woman next to me pack it in for good. Today's her last day, after 35 years as a federal employee. Good for her! As a GS-15, she'll be raking in at least $75k a year in pension and benefits (she's one of the head budgeting people, but why she has an office next to me, I'll never know).

Each time I've packed up my office to leave one job for another, I've always been ecstatic. I was fed-up with grad school, couldn't wait to move on; loved the idea of screwing over my asshole 'Head Master' at the private school I taught at; was literally jumping for joy when I got this job and left that horror of a life and job in South Florida. Needless to say, my sense of accomplishment during each packing was pretty limited. How much can you really account for in 1-4 years of work? Not much. Now 35...that's something. Then again, she did 35 years of federal service, so I probably did more during 4 years in grad school.

So here's an Oprah moment for all of us. List your top 5 professional accomplishments, or things you re most proud of.
1. Scientific publication at the age of 22.
2. Inspiring students to change majors and become biologists.
3. Seeing my work in the news/tv/books/museums.
4. Making my boss in FL realize that you cant treat people like shit.
5. Accepted into PhD program at the age of 21 (but left at 25).