Men Are Becoming Superfluous

Let's think about my reasons for having a man:

• Confidant/entertainment


• Sense of love/acceptance


• Sex


• Massage


• Cuddling


• Shared home/expenses
  

I've begun to analyze these points and determine whether I have them in my life, especially given the ever-increasing technological breakthroughs of the 21st century. Let's face it, the older you get, the more successful relationships become less about sex and physical attraction as fun and entertainment. If you have a great set of friends--which I'm slowly accumulating--what's the need for a bf? Granted, those friends may never love you, but they provide that much needed sense of acceptance. Then there's sex: the mother of all components for a young gay man...but let's face it, we all admit that jerking off is just as effective, if not better half the time. And once I start taking yoga, I'll be able to lick my own ass and give myself head. Or I can just become a bottom and experience the joys of vibrators/dildos/plugs/beads. Now I've always admitted that a good massage is much better than sex, and leading the active lifestyle that I do with constant walking, biking, gym, and swimming, I'm always in need of a good rub-down for my many sore muscles. Enter my new partner: the Homedics shiatsu massager.

I no longer need a man to rub my back, shoulders, or feet. And the best part? This one can go for hours. I think last night I literally let the thing work out the knots in my back for 2hrs straight. Put it on the floor....feet are taken care of. And no complaining about hands being tired. Couple that to a nice big body pillow, and you've got all the physical needs for having a man covered. Now I just need to find someone to split my overly inflated DC rent costs.