Foot Orgasms

I have an intimate relationship with my feet. As such, I need a partner who understands this, supports the relationship, and will satisfy my desires. This weekend I found one. You've all read about The Kid, and he was he who helped me discover this relationship. We were shopping at Pentagon City Mall when I saw my future partner from afar. Top level, somewhat inconspicuous. There it was...Clark. The Clarks store has brought joy to my life.

My attire at work is formal to business casual, either way I'm wearing dress shoes. Herein lies the problem: dress shoes aren't compatible with my 6 block walk to the Metro each way. In the year and a half I've been living in DC, I've gone thru 6 pairs of dress black shoes--or worn them enough to know that my feet deserve better. Like with men, I don't fuck around, I dump em as soon as I am confronted with even the slightest sign of incompatibility. But alas, I think I've found a true partner. Its amazing to see the evolution of shoe choice, it parallels my taste in men.

I started off with, of course, the cute Kenneth Coles. You know they look good, you think they're comfortable. But after I few weeks you tire of them. However, you keep them around for the rare dress occasion--dates, weddings, etc. Sound familiar?

I then moved on to some comfy Bass dress shoes. I actually had a pair of these before KC, but wore them out and decided to try something new. I came back to the old-standbys. They're similar to the KC's, but more walkable. Gave up after 3 months. This would be like my ex Greg, the hot caucasian Enrique Iglesias look-alike. All the features ya want, just not made for long-term durability.

Next was the Rockports. Not as cute as the KC's or Bass, but distinctive and good looking nonetheless. I still wear them. And for $75, you cant beat the comfort they provided. But alas, things wear out, and you must move on. As we used to sing in the Brownies, "Make new friends, but keep the old...one is silver and the other's gold." These are my "AtlWreck" of shoes...always gonna be there at some level.

At one point I started to question the overall comfort of the Rockports and decided to go completely with function over form. Enter the Merrell "dress shoes". Whenever I put them on, I thought of myself as the Monster from Young Frankenstein--Peter Boyle wore shoes with exaggerated soles. Eventually, my gay gene kicked back in and I couldn't wear these anymore. Plus I think they were worse for my feet, as I now have planter fasciitis. I'd compare these to the unnamed ex that we all have--we make some compromise and decide to go out with them only to realize it was a big mistake. Never compromise!

And then the skies opened, and there was sunlight. I bought a pair of Clarks as my dress brown shoes a while ago, they're great. I considered getting the same ones in black. Good thing I constantly procrastinate purchases. For it was then I discovered the Clark Privo! line. They're like wearing slippers...so comfy, great for walking, not horribly styled either. I probably could get away with them even in a suit for work--especially since straights dont look at shoes like we do. And they weren't nearly as expensive as those crappy shoes they sell at the stores on Connecticut near Dupont Circle--overpriced, and not really for walking. I have yet to find this man.

Alas, I'm happy again. Now if only I can get someone to rub my feet at night!