Most of us reading this blog are proud to be openly gay citizens, though the degree of outness sometimes varies--are you out to just yourself, family, friends, coworkers, ex-girl friends? I'm not passing judgement on what degree is good or bad, we all come to that position of acceptance and comfort at different stages in our lives. However, no matter how "Out" we seem to be as gay men, there's still the last closet door that many are unwilling to open: admitting you met someone online.Let's face it, we all do it. In fact, this medium, along with sites like Myspace, Friendster, Gay.Com, ManHunt, etc all promote online meetings. Where would we be without them? Hopelessly friendless or frequenting bars and bathhouses more often is my bet. So right...we've all met friends online. Why then are people afraid to admit to friends that they met someone online? Like coming out, it took me a while to feel comfortable saying it, but now I look back on how absurd online closets are. There's nothing funnier than the dynamic of standing with a group of friends at a bar, another acquaintance comes over, you introduce them. Inevitably the next question is "so how do you know each other?" In days past I might say, "Oh we have a mutual friend in Atlanta" or something else almost as believable. Now I say, "we met online"...and there appears the look of shock on both the faces of your group of friends and your "acquaintance"...HE SAID THE O-WORD!!
Now if you're The Imelda and drunk, you'll press even more to make the O-closeted acquaintance even more uncomfortable..."so which site was it?" I think that might be a step too far, I don't want to really "out" the person for being on men4menwholovechickensex.com or something of the sort. But I have no problems admitting it.
4 comments:
Hey-
I was not drunk. I see nothing wrong with asking about online connections. Who the F cares anyway? I think it would be much worse to say, "Oh, we met at Pottery Barn while perusing the duvet covers."
The point of this blog is that I dont care, but some people do...even though they shouldnt. SHEEESH!!
I think it's a generational gap. Back in my college days, oh so long ago, we ended up referring to everyone by their profile name because there were simply too many Johns, Jons, Matts, and Tims to keep track of. "hungryBottom4U", "PSUsucker", and "jphunk" were unique and a lot more fun. It was also such a small town that everyone knew everyone, so when you eventually met the person you knew who they were already. I concur with Imelda that the site isn't that big a deal, we all have a million profiles and you can't deny it. The true gem is getting their profile name so you can go check out their pics when you get home.
When my mother asked me where I met the mexican I said "on-line" without any problems. Having read Tales of the City, where the gay characters spend HOURS upon HOURS pickling in bath houses, I wholeheartedly agree with you and bless the internet for giving us another communication medium.
Just say slave4master, that'll shut em up.
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