Ode to Carolina

Carolina...my old home; my old friend
Why are you so unable to change?
Evolution may be considered farce, but occurs nonetheless
Except in Carolina

Yes...that was my lame attempt at poetry. Aries, being too black and white, are best not expressed in verse, but rather succinct prose. So anyway...yesterday I took a 1 day trip to Asheville for some meetings. I had high hopes of getting "something" out of this trip. But like most things in life, I was disappointed.

The disappointment occured at many levels, starting off with having to get up at 5am. WTF?! I didnt even realize that was a real time. Granted, I know it "exists" on the clock, but there are many things that we say exist, but in reality do not--like dominant bottoms. Besides a lack of sleep (and coffee), I had to drive 2hrs each way because Ashville has like 2 planes that land and take off each day from its airport. I arrived late, meetings were cancelled and rearranged, and I l got home at 11pm with the sense of "wow, I should've just had a telecon". I wont belabor this point, but just have to gloat and say..."TAKE THAT MEXICAN!" for a hellish 1 day trip to NC.

Recover. Rebuild. Rebirth.

The last three years of my life have been in many ways linked to Hurricane Katrina: I experienced the storm first hand in Florida, and the aftermath of it and Wilma were motivators to move to DC. I've also spend countless hours working with documentary producers on the subject, creating and providing video and images of the storm, giving explanations, etc. So naturally, this visit to New Orleans has a certain appeal--see how things have recovered, compare it to before the storm, and get to see the town (version 2.0) that I've dealt so much with from afar.
Things here are definitely on a more reduced scale. Everything seems the same along Canal, Poydras, or the major streets in the Quarter, but the people are fewer and the energy is lower. Last night was the first parade of Mardi Gras festivities--and that was somewhat of a let-down. But an experience, nonetheless. The one thing that amazes me about NOLA, still, is the individuality of this city. Having lived in 5 cities, I can describe how each of them has a certain feel...but the character of NOLA is definitely stronger and more unique than any city I've visited, even more than NY I'd venture to say. I'm sure that, unlike the smell of piss in the street, no storm will wash that away.

Twiddling thumbs

I like to think that I don't have the typical federal work ethic. Actually, I'm quite work obsessed when I'm in the office. Today is driving me absolutely nuts...I have 1 week til I leave for New Orleans for a huge conference and the chance to really make some $$$. My "To Do List" has 7 items on it--each one taking considerable amounts of time, all needing to be finished in a week. But here I sit...twiddling my thumbs, waiting for my computer to spit out the latest iteration of the project I'm working on. Amazing how it takes my system an hour to process 1/2 a job. Let's run down my configuration:

• Dell Precision 690, Windows XP (no 64bit Windows allowed)


• 2x 3.33GHz Intel Dual-Core Processors


• 4GB RAM


• 1TB Storage


• NVIDIA Quadro FX 3500 video card

Its a pretty substantial system. Yet here I wait. And wait more. And keep waiting. UGH!! My work OCD is driving me absolutely insane! No wonder I'm so worn out after each work day this week.

What's Today?

I was very much looking forward to this week. My calendar at work, which I live by, told me that I had a 3D modeling course all Tues-Fri at 16 and K St...which meant I could roll out of bed at 9am, cook breakfast, and bike down the hill in 15min for a 10am start. And that's what I did on Tuesday. It was then discovered that the one stability in my life--my calendar--lied to me. Wrong week. In a tizzy I quickly booked a train to Princeton for a meeting I couldnt originally make. Got the last hotel room in the area, packed a bag, and off I went to Union Station. After a successful set of meetings, I've fully overtaken the Princeton research lab and made those scientists my thralls. *evil laugh*

Tomorrow: more meetings in two cities. Friday I'm taking off...story to come. So much for swimming each night this week!

Contemptuous Careers

Most of us in DC work at relatively large agencies, companies, or corporations. Part of this work environment is dealing with people who have completely different jobs than your own, and thus personalities. In prior jobs, I had to work alongside with engineers quite often--who are their own breed of human; some may argue that they're not real people at all. Currently the people that irk me greater than any other group are those that deal with policy and political relations. Specifically inter-agency and international affairs. I often look at them and think, "God, I'd kill myself if this was my job!" It seems like all they do is worry about this or that so that no one is ever offended, regardless of how useless that entity may be in the scheme of things. Do they really take joy in sweating the little things?



Every time I deal with policy people, I just want to strangle them. I guess this is definitely one area where my Aries hinders my job--I cant bite my tongue, beat around the bush, or sugar-coat things. But maybe this is why I am single, as asked by GCC. Do I treat too many people in my social life with the same amount of disdain as I do policy makers/political kiss-asses? If so, I need to identify this flaw and potentially correct my ways.

Wasting a Day

I think its official...my work-related bulimic binging over the last three days has left me drained. I have no steam left in this tugboat. As of 11am, I've accomplished the following:

1. Sent several useless emails
2. Gave up on a satellite rainfall animation due to my ADD
3. Pretended to work on a grant proposal at the Caribou across the street
4. Pretended to go to a meeting, when in actuality I walked to the DSW three blocks away and went shoe shopping
5. Came back and wrote this pathetic excuse for a blog

Its 4pm and time to go home!

The True Measure of Success

After the two-day swim meet this weekend, I just vegged out at home for a few hours yesterday before seeing Superbad. Of course, a major component of my couch potato activities is searching for, downloading, and watching porn. Now I enjoy, and have a collection, of all types of porn "genres." However, if there's one thing I cant stand (in any porn genre), its porn with plot and scene acting. But in one I was watching yesterday--filmed in my former hometown of Ft Lauderdale--there was a intro scene with a hurricane forecaster. And lo-and-behold...there was one of my images from work. An image of Hurricane Katrina slapped in the middle of a raunchy bb gay porno. YES!!! I've finally made it. Yet again, more ways in which porn intersects with my life.

The image used in the porn.

Hurricanes!

Its no secret to my friends what I do for a living. But I thought I'd share with the rest of you some of the stuff I've done today.

• Kickass animation of Hurricane Dean and Tropical Depression Erin

You'll want to have QuickTime to see the animation above. Enjoy!

Packing it in

One might assume by the title of this blog that it would be another discourse on being a top, or something of the sort. Nope. Right now I'm literally listening to the woman next to me pack it in for good. Today's her last day, after 35 years as a federal employee. Good for her! As a GS-15, she'll be raking in at least $75k a year in pension and benefits (she's one of the head budgeting people, but why she has an office next to me, I'll never know).

Each time I've packed up my office to leave one job for another, I've always been ecstatic. I was fed-up with grad school, couldn't wait to move on; loved the idea of screwing over my asshole 'Head Master' at the private school I taught at; was literally jumping for joy when I got this job and left that horror of a life and job in South Florida. Needless to say, my sense of accomplishment during each packing was pretty limited. How much can you really account for in 1-4 years of work? Not much. Now 35...that's something. Then again, she did 35 years of federal service, so I probably did more during 4 years in grad school.

So here's an Oprah moment for all of us. List your top 5 professional accomplishments, or things you re most proud of.
1. Scientific publication at the age of 22.
2. Inspiring students to change majors and become biologists.
3. Seeing my work in the news/tv/books/museums.
4. Making my boss in FL realize that you cant treat people like shit.
5. Accepted into PhD program at the age of 21 (but left at 25).

Will Elvis leave the building?

Its a beautiful, sunny, 88 degree day out today, and I'm sitting in the office all alone. Note: I have all the guys working with me in a big open area, which facilitates idea sharing and improves productivity--how Japanese. So when no one is here, the usual level of energy is quite depressed. Now I know that if it was me that was gone, the peons would leave too. So should I do the same, or be good and get some work done? This will be my last day of rest at work for the summer. Between a new intern starting Monday and hurricane season, things are gonna get crazy here. So, as the Clash aptly asked, "Should I stay or should I go now?"

Occupational Buhlimia

I often joke about being occupationally bulimic--a binge and purge in productivity. I've always enjoyed observing work dynamics (as its a form of people-watching). I'm surrounded by two different groups here in my bureaucratic cubicle: budgeting and a research group. It seems like neither ever do any work--which is expected of any good federal employee. But at least they're consistent with their level of effort and output. For example, the budget head is discussing the complexity of making lemon bars right now. Fascinating. (I really hate all things lemon, besides alcohol)

So back to the topic at hand: occupational bulimia. My job is a little management, a little production--my group does graphics and media production, so I dabble in it when I'm bored of being a manager. Lately my manager:graphics ratio has been dropping. So yea...sometimes we'll output 2 or 3 animations a day. Of course, afterwards I go home and crash. *BINGE* I track it all on a calendar. In contrast, we've done two things this whole month. *PURGE* Amazing. I've spent most of my time lookin out the window at Caribou Coffee wishing I could somehow cram more caffeine into my system (while praying for their stock to go back up).